Hartley: Fun times at the Black Hole
The big news this week … the Colts traded for last year’s #3 pick in the draft, Trent Richardson.
The media immediately blew it out of proportion. A MONSTER TRADE. A BLOCKBUSTER TRADE. One person talked about him being traded like Herschel Walker being traded back in the day. Right.
Trent Richardson being traded is only considered a monster trade because the NFL never has trades and he was drafted high. It is hardly a monster trade.
First of all he shouldn’t have been drafted number 3 overall. He is severely overrated. I think every Alabama RB is overrated. I could run for 1,500 yards at Alabama behind five essentially pro linemen. Their line is better than half of the NFL teams’ offensive lines. And they have better facilities then the Raiders. Trent Richardson, Mark Ingran and Eddie Lacy are all overrated. Haven’t you noticed as soon as one RB leaves or gets hurt the next one excels and is considered great?
Last week I didn’t even mention this one. After the Steelers lost their all-pro center to injury in week one, QB Ben Roethlisberger marvelled at how he and backup center Kelvin Beechum didn’t mishandle one snap. He stressed how people need to realize how difficult that is after not taking a single snap together in practice all week. Hilarious. He is the supposed elite QB of the Pittsburgh Steelers and they score nine points against one of the league’s worst defenses and he wants praise for holding his hands under another man’s nuts long enough to get the snap correct?
The Raiders look decent now instead of completely lost. But they don’t have enough offensive firepower. Their defense looks pretty good. But they’ll lose this week. Why? Because the Raiders are still a shell of a once proud and elite sports franchise. Because:
1. They play football in a sandbox. They have a football field with a baseball field in the middle of it. The NFL is a megabillion dollar industry and they still have to share a field with a little league baseball team. A warning track on the football field? Embarrassing.
2. Because their raggedy ass stadium is so decrepit, the sewage system has backed up into the locker-room and the dugout … twice. When the football team has gone to get dressed, there has actually been feces backed up in the locker room. This matches the product they have put on the field for the last decade.
Jughead Manning and the Broncos will beat ‘em this week 31-20. Jughead is playing well and while the Raiders have a great front 7, it appears, unfortunately, that they have a non-existent back 4 … and feces in their locker room.
How long before the players revolt knowing the team can’t give them the respect to keep the locker room poop-free? I wouldn’t even go there as a fan knowing the sewage system can back up in the stadium. Ridiculous. Instead of the stadium being nicknamed the BLACK HOLE, they should call it the SHIT HOLE. Not only can you get stabbed to death in the stands, you would bleed out in a pool of excrement. Ugh. It must be impossible to be a Raider fan. And people pay for season tickets to wallow in that place??
Tampa Bay Coach Greg Schiano now apparently isn’t a Darrelle Revis favorite anymore. What a surprise. Revis is alway upset about something or begging for affection or wants a new contract. I bet the Bucs were happy to get him and in about three months they will be answering his press conference and arguing with him about his contract. When you smell a rat and you take that rat on your team, you cannot complain later about the rotting cheese. You got what you deserved. And they will dread having him on their team before long. Tick Tock.
Brandon Weedin has a sprained thumb on his right hand. The Cleveland Browns have a sprained bum at QB.
Bo Pellini is the coach of the Nebraska Cornhuskers. There is NOTHING in Nebraska for fans to do but watch corn grow, cows screw and Nebraska Cornhusker football. And the coach of Nebraska is ranting and raving and recorded BLASTING Nebraska fans. The very people that pay his dumb, underperforming ass. And he thinks this will end well. Hilarious. Some of these coaches are so stupid. And looking at him … he just looks stupid. How did he get through a job interview?
Everyone is up in arms about the SEC and Oklahoma State football having sex for recruits practices. And the only thing I can think is … shouldn’t every job have that in their benefits package? I would love to go to a job interview and say “Okay okay, medical … dental … pet insurance … blah blah blah. Everyone has that … what is the booty situation? What have you got to offer in a sex package?
You have to be creative with your benefits package.
It is bad enough – grown men fighting to keep their hair, but what about the people that still have it … and want to make sure you know it no matter how ridiculous they look. When you see 55-year old men with gray nappy dreadlocks … they are just trying to make sure you know they still have their hair.
They should cut it, but they won’t. When you see the brothas that are in their late 30s and early 40s and they are wearing the DL Hughley nasty pickaninny twists … they don’t really like that look … they are just trying to say “I got my s%$# still homey.”
Just don’t do it. It’s never cool to look like you don’t comb your hair. The 55-year old white guys with the Rob Ryan do … DON’T. Just NO. You got your hair … cool, but that looks like s%$#. Cut your hair. It’s time to be a big boy.
