That no-good Goodell?

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell appears to be dishonest. You mean to tell me that this whole second Ray Rice video was delivered to NFL headquarters and received by someone but NOBODY saw it? Yeah, right. Goodell is parsing his words to avoid answering the questions. He sounds a lot like a politician. Some people are surprised. I’m not. All that being said, what are they going to do if he lied? Fire him? The owners ain’t gonna fire him. Give it a rest. He saw the video, he made his own typical, ridiculous decision and now he is covering. So what? He didn’t commit a crime. Personally, I think he should be dismissed, but the owners might not.

The first week of the season is over, and what a week it was. Before everyone starts buying Super Bowl tickets or heading for ledges, let’s remember:

The Dolphins are not that good. The Patriots will still get their 10 or 11 wins. But they aren’t that good, either. The Jets beat the Raiders, but they’re not a real football team anyway. The Bills are a wayward mess. The Cowboys, well, I would be worried if I were you, “America’s Team” fans. The Lions beat the Giants, which isn’t even a high school level team. Rams fans, you should have expected this: Jeff Fisher has made himself a legend with his mediocrity.

Sorry, 49ers fans, Colin Kaepernick is not that good. And Bears fans, Jay Cutler isn’t regressing; he has always been fundamentally flawed. Just be happy his arm is still strong. When that fades, he will be a hot, steaming pile on a humid, 100-degree day in Charleston, South Carolina.

This week’s picks:

Steelers 27, Ravens 20. This used to be a smash-mouth, hard-hitting 13-10 game every time they played. But now both defenses are suspect. The Steelers appear to be able to score at will, but can’t stop anyone that runs a “hurry up” offense. What’s wrong with the Steelers? They still maintain their NFL edge as the only team with a Prevent Defense AND Prevent Offense. I have never understood why they can get a 10-point lead and think they can just shut off the offense and try to grind the game out. It is called the RRPP Offensive strategy. Run, Run, Pass, Punt.

They used it against Cleveland and the Browns took full advantage of it. Steelers coach Mike Tomlin hasn’t figured that out in 8 years? And The Steelers defensive strategy is more confused than Michael Sam at a strip club with a pocket full of $1 bills, Viagra and Ecstasy. The Steelers run a 3-4 D, but they don’t blitz enough to put consistent pressure on the QB. So essentially they are hitting you with a 3 man rush most of the time. And they need to move on from Dick LeBeau this year. Look, I love LeBeau too, but time has passed him by. Either run the 3-4 the right way or switch to a 4-3.

Dolphins 26, Bills 16. Everyone is raving about the Dolphins beating the Patriots. Big deal. Don’t be fooled. First game, good win, but the team is just not that good. Mike Wallace is one good hit away from refusing to catch any pass not thrown at him unless he’s 30 yards downfield with no chance of a safety or cornerback hitting him square. Meanwhile, the Bills also won last week against Chicago and everyone was impressed … except me. In the first game of the season you typically get some surprises. And besides, the Bears have an overhyped moron (Cutler) at QB. Cutler threw more picks than a power forward in Phil Jackson’s triangle offense. The Bills are still limited offensively. They have finally figured out to use CJ Spiller, but he doesn’t impress me as QB at all. And I can easily see him taking off running and taking a square hit. Injured Reserve, here he comes.

Falcons 16, Bengals 24. Last week, the Falcons were like OJ Simpson in his murder trial: no defense and they still won. Don’t get your hopes up; they are abysmal. The Bengals beat the Ravens last week, but they should have beaten the Ravens. They should have little trouble with the Falcons’ D. And Stephen Jackson is still on an NFL roster. That makes me chuckle.

Saints 31, Browns 22. New Orleans has too much offense for the Browns. I do like that RB tandem the Browns have since Ben Tate has taken his usual position on the trainer’s table and the injury list. Saints defensive coach Rob “Slob” Ryan is overrated as hell. His defenses have done nothing legendary. He’s trading off the family name, as the son of former defensive coordinator and head coach Buddy Ryan and the twin brother of current head coach of the New York Jets head coach, Rex Ryan. And where Rex is concerned, that ain’t saying too much.

Cowboys 33, Titans 27. Dallas should beat Tennessee easily, but I have no idea where QB Tony Romo’s head is now after last week. I am usually one that says he takes too much heat, but that performance last week was DREADFUL. I can’t imagine two things this week: 1. That Romo will play that bad and 2. That Jake Locker will have another good game.

Patriots 24, Vikings 22. Tom Brady versus Matt Cassel – teacher versus pupil, or the Has Been versus the Never Was. Brady is clearly not what he was. The Pats are in decline, but no one will say so because of coach Bill Belichick’s “GENIUS.” They haven’t figured out defense in YEARS, but every year the media finds a way to proclaim he has rebuilt his defense. And their famously frustrating inability to draft a WR who can run and catch at the same time is mind-boggling. Is it any wonder you can sell people Pet Rocks and Chrysler automobiles?

Cardinals 23, Giants 12. Giants QB Eli Manning and the so-called “new offense” is a mess. He’s not a good QB. Eli had two GREAT postseason runs, but in both of those regular seasons he was average at best. The Cardinals have a better defense, but half the defense is hurt or suspended. And they have no running game, but neither do the Giants, who also have no passing or blocking. Cardinals D still better than the Giants’ offense, and the Cardinals offense is better than the Giants’ defense.

Jaguars 20, Redskins 16. I am on the Jaguars bandwagon. Then again, I think I AM the Jags bandwagon. I think Jacksonville’s D is going to be STOUT and carry them to a few wins. They started off well against the Eagles last week, but folded late. Still, I think they win this week at Washington. RG3 is just a few snaps from being benched and the Redskins looked horrible last week.

Lions 24, Panthers 17. Carolina surprised me with Derek Anderson at QB, but Detroit beat the Giants. And I don’t much like Carolina’s offense and think their D won’t be as dominant this year.

Rams 10, Buccaneers 20. Don’t watch this game. It will ruin your faith in football. The Rams are lame, plain and simple. The Bucs should put in Mike Glennon at QB.

Chiefs 20, Broncos 33. Kansas City coach Andy Reid is already in self-destruct mode. No rushing, no QB … no wonder they got crushed by the Titans last week.

Jets 17, Packers 22. Enough said.

Texans 13, Raiders 17. Wow, I actually have absolutely nothing interesting to say about this game. Jadeveon Clowney is injured already. Bottom line: Raiders suck less.

Bears 16, 49ers 25. I don’t like either QB, but the 49ers have better D.

Eagles 20, Colts 30 (Monday night). Nick Foles versus Andrew Luck. Last week, Foles turned the ball over like a pair of nuts at a Lilith Fair concert. And the Eagles D sucks.

Seahawks 24, Chargers 16. The Chargers have no home field advantage and QB Phil Rivers didn’t play well even against Arizona last week. Done deal.

And, on a side note, Mammoth Lakes Calif., I’ve been there for the Festival of Beers and Bluesapalooza, where 80 microbreweries pitch their products  under the guise of a blues festival. Great event, including 5 hours of non-stop beer tasting. Now, that alone should put your town up as an alcohol-friendly party haven, and that’s only for one weekend.

But now they have a Rock n Rye Festival (going on this very weekend in the Village). This time only 5 breweries will be there, and the event is being disguised as a “hillbilly” musicfestival, BUT … 32 distilleries will be on hand. I have to tell you, Mammoth, you might have a drinking problem. 32 distilleries in one place. When do we start tasting?