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Hey Eddie … you’re fat

  • by Harold Hartley
  • in Opinion/Editorial
  • — 22 Jan, 2016

And so it ended. Another Steeler season ended in resounding disappointment. Ugly. This was one of the worst seasons in history as far as I am concerned. Yeah, the record was okay, but the team was a disaster. Loads of talent, but undisciplined players and coaches. So what will they do next year? They will bring back the same coaches and the same dumbass QB. And expect a different result.

The Steelers lost to the Broncos even though Bronco QB Peyton Manning looked terrible. But you don’t need your noodle-armed QB to be at his best to beat the Steelers. As he threw the short passes, the only passes he is capable of throwing these days, and the Steelers CBs played 6 yards off the receiver on 3rd and 3, I chuckled at the Steeler game plan and so did Peyton Manning. It was like a flashback of watching what the immortal Tim Tebow did to the Steelers a few years ago in the playoffs. The Steelers really are one of the dumbest teams in the league.

Nevertheless, the Steelers had a chance to win the game. Or so most folks thought when the Steelers got the ball with 3 minutes left and down by 7 points. But I didn’t feel we had a chance to win. Not because the Bronco defense is so impressive. Rather, because QB Ben Roethlisberger is not good in such situations.

I can assure you I could defend  Ben with three minutes left. DON’T LET ANYTHING DEEP. Don’t go man to man and go crazy. Just play back and let him throw underneath … because he doesn’t have the patience or intelligence to take what the defense gives you. If you force him to make 9 throws to score, he won’t do it. He likes the deep throws and going over the top. If you make him go play by play he will screw himself and the team. When it is 3rd and 3 he will throw it 45 yards and put you in 4th and 3 every time. And on 4th and 3 he wont throw it 4 or 5 or 6 and move the chains………he will go over the top and try for the big play. Run the safety up like he is playing the run but let him bail out before the snap … Ben will try to beat the safety over the top. Every time. So when he gets the ball late, I never feel we are going to win. It will always end with a sack or two, where they blame the line.

 

Games this week

 

Patriots vs Broncos. Belichick makes Manning his bitch (again). Pats win on the road 26-16. I could devise a plan to stifle Manning right now. I am sure Belichickenhead can. I hate the Pats being in another Super Bowl, but the best coach and best QB of our generation deserve their due.

As if Tom Brady needs any more motivation. Bronco players have spent all week telling the media how Brady is a whiner and how they only need 1 second to sack him. Yeah, if you are playing Brady, the king of wearing an imaginary chip on his shoulder the size of New England, the best thing to do is create another chip for him to wear. They should call Antonio Smith, (That’s right. Who?) former safety for the Steelers that called out Brady once before a game against the Pats. Brady shredded the Steelers and made a point of throwing the ball in Smith’s direction every play. I think Brady even wrote Smith’s name and number on the ball before throwing it his way and letting the receiver show Smith the ball every time he scored. Pats scored 55 points that day.

Cardinals at Panthers. Panthers win 31-20. Cam Newton would literally have to win this game, throw for 500 yards and 5 tds and run for two more TDS for people to take him seriously. And I hope he does.


Why are people still arguing that college athletes shouldn’t get paid? Why? College players generate MILLIONS of dollars for their institutions and their states.. Why do people get so mad about them getting a free education AND money? They don’t care that Peyton Manning is making $30 million a year or Tom Hanks makes $30 million a movie. So why are they so mad about players getting paid money they are helping to generate? There is no other way to explain it but jealousy.

Redskin QB Kirk Cousins is about to GET PAID. And he is going to be a failure. Check his numbers in his road games. When the pressure is on in a hostile enviornment he folds like a cheap hooker. Next year’s prediction: More interceptions than TDs.

The Tennessee Titans hired Mike Mularkey as head coach. Because they are smarter than the other two GMS that previously hired that sorry bastard? Some teams are destined to suck forever.

Packer RB Eddie Lacy got called out by his head coach for being what everyone else in America knows he is … A FAT F&*K. I don’t know why they let him play. They should have made him inactive the first week he came out wearing a Krispy Kreme doughnut for a mouthpiece. If I were the Packers, I would work the hell out of him. Work him like one of those people on Biggest Loser. As soon as he lost the weight I would trade him. And hand him a gift card for $500 to Krispy Kreme and Buffalo WIld Wings on his way out the door.

The Packers lost their last two playoff games in OT and never touched the ball. Aaron Rodgers is 0-7 all time in OT. What? But after this game people are fucking crying about changing the OT rules again because Aaron Rodgers didn’t get the ball in OT. Screw that. The rules are fine. If a team cannot stop the other team from scoring a TD on the first possession of OT, they deserve to lose.

More on Dumbass Roethlisberger. I guess Ben’s arm wasn’t falling off like he described it. Nice of him to set up his excuse in advance for his terrible play.

Chip Kelly was hired by the Niners. Gonna save the franchise and Colin Kaepernick. That’s some funny s&^%.  I think he will fail again. At least this time he isn’t the GM. But someone needs to convince him that NFL football consists of offense AND defense. You cant run an offensive play every 3 seconds and expect your defense to get … OXYGEN. We will see how Chip Phase II goes??

Meanwhile, the Eagles hired Doug Pederson as head coach. Hilarious. Doug Pederson has been an offensive coordinator in the NFL … but has never called his own plays. He has never been a head coach, either. But he is going to be the Eagles coach. AND he is going to call his own plays. Yeah, this is destined to work. The Eagles are making mistake after mistake. I cannot wait to tap into Philly Talk Show Radio about week five next season. This is gonna be GREAT!!!!

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— Harold Hartley

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