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THE GROW

  • by Jack Lunch
  • in News
  • — 23 Jun, 2019

Below right are the marijuana plants being grown behind Mammoth Nursery, in plain view. 

We told Nursery owner Jenny Bouwman that we’d been alerted to the plants, and that they are in violation of Town Ordinance 18-02, which states that outdoor cultivation of cannabis is illegal within town limits. 

In effect, she told us to pound sand. 

But it got us sand-pounders to thinking. The reason the Town’s so rudderless right now, and never mind Paul, is that we can’t seem to find any common ground on our various ideas. 

So what if we combine them all? 

Forget The Parcel. Too many hero-ball playing bureaucrats to make that happen. Forget the MUF. Too In-Tents. And rest in peace, Billy Buck. 

How about The Grow? Housed inside a 25-acre translucent tent at Shady Rest Parcel. And we’ll grow marijuana there. Which we’ll sell, and become the wealthiest and most notorious ski town in America. 

And we’ll place cots next to the rows and have the Town’s pizzerias deliver on an hourly basis, so we’ll fix the housing problem while we’re at it, and boost small business. 

But as I get rolling on this idea, Gorman informs me that it’s been done before. I’ll let him take the keyboard from here. 

Stephen Baldwin and Pauly Shore did it in the 1995 movie Bio-Dome. 

The plot: Shore and Baldwin accidentally enter a giant dome while looking for a place to pee and get sealed into a closed-door, dome experiment with five environmental scientists for one year. They proceed to eat all the food too quickly, get pizza delivered to the dome, destory various experiments and grow “Purple Sticky Punch.”

Shore and Baldwin do a better job during the movie of explaining the plant’s benefits than we ever could.

Shore: “I know what you’re thinking, ‘Illegal! Illegal!’ But the value of Purple Sticky Punch goes way beyond just toking it. Ain’t that right, Professor Johnson?”

Baldwin: “That’s correct, Professor Macintosh. Purple Sticky Punch, or hemp, is an excellent source of paper. It makes a fine rope. It can even make a contaminant- free fuel. But the greatest value to us Bio-Domers is its rapid rate of photosynthesis, which means more oxygen for everyone.”

Speaking of bio-domes … 

The Mono County Planning Commission unanimously approved a use-permit for a company called BASK Ventures to grow 10,000 square feet of cannabis in a building in the Sierra Business Park across from the Mammoth Yosemite Airport.

BASK Ventures is made up four friends who have lived in Mammoth Lakes seasonally; Brian Herman, Ames Ressa, Steven Kent, and Kyle Paben.

The proposed indoor grow-house would be 21,858 square feet. A 10,000 square foot cannabis canopy was approved. The building will have no windows or signage, and the odor will be mitigated to be no more obnoxious than other industrial facilities.

Brian Herman stood before the commission as the proponent of this project. He said that BASK hopes to grow about 2-3,000 square feet of canopy in its first year with only one grower and the four owner-operators on staff. It will not distribute, but will sell its product to a distributor. BASK hopes to grow its operation to eventually operate as its own distributor and cultivate the maximum 10,000 square foot canopy.

Since BASK will not be a distributor it will not have a say over whether its product will be sold at retailers in Mammoth Lakes.

Commissioner Scott Bush asked purely out of curiosity how cannabis is priced and if there is a commodity market for it.

Herman said that there are essentially three tiers: outdoor, greenhouse, and indoor, indoor being the highest quality. From that baseline, exact pricing is worked out between the grower and distributor.

Roberta Lagomarsini said that this farm seems like, “the perfect location.” No opposition was voiced during the hearing from the public and no letters of opposition were submitted.

BASK now must receive an operating permit from Mono County Supervisors and a license from the state. BASK hopes to build its facility this summer.

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Topics: Bio-DomeJenny BouwmanMammoth NurseryThe Parcel

— Jack Lunch

Jack is the publisher and editor of The Sheet. He writes a lot of page two's.

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