Shrek or donkey
I can’t figure it out. I don’t know if new Laker Coach Mike Brown is Shrek or Donkey.
When he was in Cleveland, he always stood there with that ridiculous look on his face. Perpetually perplexed by what was going on. The team didn’t score – he yells get back on defense. Then they go back up the floor on offense and he stands there. A foul’s not called for LeBron James so they don’t score again. He spreads his arms – the clueless look again.
His Cav offense consisted of him throwing the ball out and saying “LeBron Score” and “Play Defense.” That was it. The team looked terrible. I know they won 60 games but when they hit the playoffs, they hit the wall. Much like the Bulls this year, they couldn’t score. NO offensive imagination.
And now they bring his ass to Los Angeles where they love flash and flair? He is going to run what offense? Does he run the triangle still? He will throw the ball out and say “Kobe Score” and “Play Defense.” A ridiculous hire. If they are running the triangle again, why not hire Phil Jackson’s assistant Brian Shaw?
When I think about Brown’s personality, fumbling appearance and ridiculous gestures … he is Shrek. He doesn’t appear to have the gift of gab the donkey has. He is Shrek. The new Laker coach.
Lakers continued … apparently Center Andrew Bynum is untouchable as far as trades go. Andrew Bynum is far from untouchable. He has been touched quite a bit … by every team trainer, continuously, ‘cause he is always hurt. I am tired of hearing about his potential after all these years. At some point you don’t have potential. You are just disappointing. He is Andrew Bynum … A.B. … Always Broken.
T.O. is in the news again. He absolutely cannot stand to not have his name in the media. First they said he had a torn ACL and would miss the season or wouldn’t be ready ‘til November or December. Now his agent is saying he already had surgery in April and will be ready by the time the season starts in September. Really? He is, according to his snake-oil salesman of an agent, “an incredible healer” and will be ready. At the age of 37? I don’t believe it for a minute.
The Portland Trailblazers offered Greg Oden (the new missing link since Patrick Ewing is retired) $8.8 million to stay with the team. And I can’t imagine why. I get that they drafted him number one overall but that was their mistake. Why compound it? They should have taken Kevin Durant.
How does a 7-foot tall, unathletic immobile statue with two bad knees command almost $9 million. Offer him a couple million and if he walks, so be it. They are an organization that makes bad decisions. They gave Brandon Roy a huge contract when he already had suspect knees. Now a year later they can’t play Roy more than 15 minutes a night and want him to retire.
For years, they had so many malcontents on their team that the whole city hated the roster of pothead thug wannabes.
They had Drazen Petrovic on the bench for years, finally traded him to the Nets and he damn near led the league in scoring.
They drafted Sam Bowie over Michael Jordan and were dumb enough to make the same mistake 25 years later. They are stupid. They deserve to lose and the fans buying tickets deserve to be miserable.
Charlie Sheen says he took steroids when he did the movie Major League and it increased his pitch velocity from 79 to 85 mph. Why anyone would listen to that nut is beyond me. And the funniest thing is, he said the steroids made him a little more irritable.
Then what the hell is he taking now?
