All hail the deflatriots

Packer Coach Mike McCarthy deserves A TON of blame for that loss to the Seahawks last week. I hear people saying “the players lost the game.” That is goofy. Of course, the players made some bonehead plays but throughout the first half McCarthyhad chances to put the Seahawks away and kept kicking FGs and refusing to go for it on 4th and a yard or less. They were up 16-0 but it should have been at least 24-0.

In the secong half, the Packers had a 12 point lead and the ball with 6:52 left in the game and the idiot coach with supposedly the best QB in the league ran the ball into an 8 or 9 man front two times then called a pass play short of the marker on third down. The defense forces a turnover and McCarthy simply repeats the same horrible play calling.

Then, when Seattle scores to take a 3 point lead he opens up the offense and drives down for a FG in probably 60 seconds. What a moron. He thought they had the game won and got tight.

Addendum. Seattle CB Richard Sherman played with one wing after hurting his arm and the Packers and their genius coach couldn’t figure out how to run slant routes on him and make him tackle someone?? Ridiculous.

The Packers and  the Lions are both sitting home right now because they played way too conservative in games they HAD to WIN. The Patriots and Seahawks push the envelope in everything and they are in the Super Bowl.

Are we really talking about the Patriots playing with their balls? The big story this week has been the report that the footballs supplied by the Patriots in the AFC Championship game were on average two pounds below the league standard for ball pressure. So The Patriot footballs were underinflated. Who cares? So QB Tom Brady had a better grip on his balls? This is hardly the reason the Pats beat the Colts by 38 points. They could have played with basketballs and mauled the Colts in that game.

Now I don’t think for a minute the Patriots handling their balls caused them to win that game. But they should be punished severely for their ball issues. They basically grabbed their balls like Seattle RB Marshawn Lynch does to the opposing teams and said “take that NFL.” Patriot Coach Bill Belichick has been caught cheating a couple of times and will continue to cheat until the league levies a punishment that means something. I think they should suspend him for several games and take away two first round picks.

The NFL is so weak when it comes to punishing the RIGHT people it is laughable. I remember during the lockout of the NFL officials when the replacement refs were attracting  everyone’s ire. The NFL came out one week and said “there will be no berating of the replacement officials and the league will punish coaches doing so.” The very next game, on national TV, Belichick went ballistic on the officials all night. You know what the NFL did in response? Nothing. The NFL wants to punish players for smoking pot, but everything else is alright.

This Super Bowl, Belichick should go completely off the rails and flip the NFL the bird. He should have Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson on the sidelines in Patriot jerseys. He should have a bucket of balls on the sidelines with a bike pump leaning against the bucket and sandpaper draped over the balls as well. He should have videographers with sniper scopes focused on the opposing coaches. The Patriots should put big buckets of different colored pills on the Gatorade table … maybe just Adderall and amphetamine colored starburst and skittles. Maybe have Lester Hayes and Fred Biletnikoff on the sidelines with stickum hanging from chains inside their trenchcoats like they are selling NOLEX watches in New York City. Belichick should have the doctors that got outed in the Balco and A-Rod steroid scandals on the sidelines with stethoscopes and needles. IF you are gonna mess with the league, go all out. How about strippers on the sidelines giving the referees standing lapdances the whole game? ……..the people manning the first down chains and the replay booth too. Push the envelope to such an extent that the league has to man up ….  and grow some balls.

I find it interesting that the two coaches in the Super Bowl are the league’s most respected coaches, but also the two coaches widely regarded as cheaters. The ‘Hawks  have had Adderall, HGH and practice violation issues for years – never mind they recruited Pete Carroll for the job after it became apparent the NCAA was catching up to his shenanigans at USC and he had to jump to the NFL. The Patriots always have some conspiracy going on. They are both aggressive coaches and very borderline on all the rules. And they face off in the Super Bowl. Coincidence?

Around the NFL 

The Jets hired Todd Bowles as head coach. I was happy, but at the same time skeptical because I felt he needed to hire a great offensive coordinator. I didn’t want him to have black coach’s disease (See Lovie Smith, Mike Tomlin, et. al.) defined as “play great defense and manage the game on offense.”

So what does Bowles do? He hires Chan Gailey as offensive coordinator. What? I think Gailey has been managing a Dairy Queen the last few years. And before he left football, because no one would hire his dumb ass again, his offenses were boring. What is Bowles going to do next, ask Herm Edwards and Tony Dungy for play calling advice?

Why do people love the Colts GM? They say QB Andrew Luck is carrying the team because he has no talent but at the same time say the Colts GM is terrific. Isn’t this the same guy who drafted Bjorn Werner in the first round as a LB and he was inactive for the playoffs because he isn’t any good. Isn’t this the guy who traded first round picks for RB Trent Richardson, also inactive last Sunday?

Doug Marrone opted out of his job as Bills head coach, thinking he was going to get a better offer elsewhere. Turns out that “better offer” is as an assistant head coach and porta-potty coordinator with the Jaguars. Makes no snese. We are not getting the whole story here. I don’t know if his agent fed him some bad info about other teams wanting him, but I can’t wait to hear this one come out.

Kyle Shanahan was hired as offensive coordinator of the Falcons. Last name hire only.

The Bears hired John Fox as head coach … who the Broncos fired for his inept offense. Then the Bears hired Adam Gase, who was John Fox’s asoffensive coordinator with the Broncos. Well, I guess technically he had the title of offensive coordinator, even though that was Peyton Manning’s job. Look for a lot of 13-12 games out of Chicago next year. The Bears cannot do anything right.

The Niners hired a coach because he is “not like [Jim] Harbaugh.” Hmmm. They better hope he wins like Harbaugh.