The NFL playoff predictions.
Bengals 17 Jets 13. Interesting. The Jets blew them out last week, but that didn’t really mean anything. The Jets were playing to get in.
If the Bengals were smart, they were observing and taking notes. BUT I have no faith in the Bengals. They have forgotten how to throw the ball and think they can just run it every down.
That said, Jet QB Mark Sanchez is a rookie and not that good. The Jets are big-headed and don’t handle success well. The Jets are notorious for doing interviews while they are winning and then disappearing when they lose.
Neither of these teams is a factor in the playoffs. Jets disappear first.
Patriots 27 Ravens 16. The Pats aren’t that good, but the Ravens are worse. People need to get out of their Groundhog Day routines. This is not the year 2000 and the Raven defense can be burned through the air.
Meanwhile. 2nd year QB Joe Flacco is overrated and will throw a few interceptions. I heard an “expert” on the NFL network, Mike Mayock, say the Pats will lose because QB Tom Brady doesn’t have WR Wes “I caught 123 passes for 1,300 yards and 4 TDs and caught every one of them within 3 yards of the line of scrimmage” Welker, who’s out for the year with a knee injury.
People heap praise on Welker, as if he makes the Patriots who they are. And since he has been there they have won zero Super Bowls. Brady won 3 Super Bowls with receivers Troy Brown, David Givens and Deion Branch so they don’t need a go-to receiver and Wes Welker isn’t a number one. That would be Randy Moss.
Eagles 23 Cowboys 20. The Cowboys are playing good right now. The Eagles are explosive on offense. Tossup goes to the Eagles because I can’t stand Cowboy QB Tony Romo or Coach Wade Phillips.
Packers 30 Cards 21. Every week, the Cards change their identity from winners to bums and back again. The Pack can score in bunches and their defense is streaky. The Cards have a few injuries …
Consider this going into the playoffs:
The Broncos started 6-0 and missed the playoffs.
Vikings started 10-1 and finished 12-4. They’ve peaked.
Saints were 13-0 and finished 13-3. Rested their players the last game after they didn’t play well the previous 2? Huh? Peaked early.
Bengals lost 4 of their last 7. Only beat Cleveland, Detroit and Kansas City.
Jets. Won 5 of last 6. Beat Buffalo, Carolina and Tampa. Then Cincy and Indy, who’d already clinched playoff spots, laid down for them. Jet QBs have thrown for 154 yards OR LESS over the last 7 games. That s%$# will not work in the playoffs.
2nd round predictions
Colts 27 Bengals 14.
Chargers 30 Pats 20.
Packers 30 Saints 23 (Before the season began I picked this as my NFC championship game with the Saints winning, but Packer QB Aaron Rodgers is better than I thought).
Eagles 24 Vikings 17.
Chargers vs Colts. Norv Turner to the Super Bowl? Are you kidding me? But the Chargers have the Colts’ number. Chargers 33 Colts 29.
Packers 30 Eagles 27, but it could go either way.
Super Bowl: Packers 24 Bolts 20.
The Redskins have signed Mike Shanahan as their coach for 5 years. That in itself guarantees mediocrity. He hasn’t won s%$# since 1997. But even worse, they made him Vice President of all Football Operations. Why? Why would Owner Daniel Snyder give this dumbass all that power after he proved he couldn’t do it in Denver? He was so bad in Denver that the owner, his best friend, fired him first as a GM, then as a coach. Snyder is clueless.
Washington Wizard Guard Gilbert Arenas. What is wrong with this idiot? The idiocy begins because he has guns he wants to get out of his house … so he takes them to work? The guns were unregistered. Then he argues with a teammate and breaks them out. But says he didn’t point the guns at anyhone. Just broke them out. HUH?? He then appears on television and maintains he didn’t do anything wrong and has nothing to apologize for. THEN while the police and NBA are investigating the situation, this dumbass, in pregame warmups, pretends to shoot his teammates with fake guns.
He is then amazed when the league suspends him.
I told you all after Giant WR Plaxico Burress got arrested and jailed on gun charges that the dumbest of the dumb would learn nothing from it. And I was right. So now Arenas is suspended and losing $147,000 per game. OUCH.
And they are probably going to void his contract and suspend him for the rest of the season. What a dumbass. I can’t even express how little sympathy I have for him.
You ever sit at work and wish that you could cuss the hell out of the very people that keep you in business? I was at work last week and someone said the soap in the customer restroom was out. Okay, so I put a temporary bottle in there. We have those built-in-the-wall units. You hit the button and the stuff shoots out. It was empty so I gave them a little pump bottle. Since the Lysol was gone, I dropped another one of those in there too. The janitor comes at night, so it was a temporary fix.
Later in the day, a customer comes in and says “that bathroom is a mess. It needs to be cleaned.”
The customer that just left had to be the one that made the mess. I look in. It’s bad. I shut it down for the rest of the day. But I do notice that the soap and Lysol bottle are gone. Seriously? How bad is it if you have to go to the bank and steal the soap and Lysol. Really? I am hot now.
Next morning, I check the bathroom. It is clean. Later in the day a customer says “the soap isn’t working.” I go in and the soap isn’t working. And it wasn’t working all day. The dumbass janitor put the soap in so thick in the dispenser it wouldn’t feed through the pump. And it has been like that ALL DAY.
This is the part that pisses me off the most. It is 2 p.m. now and we open at 8:30 a.m. So people have been using the bathroom all day and then coming back to the offices and putting their hands all over everything. They are shaking hands and using pens and clipboards … and you cannot imagine how many people feel the need to shake your hand. For no apparent reason. With all kinds of germs on their hands. That is why I am prepared. I have Clorox wipes, hand sanitizer, a torch and all kinds of germ warfare artillery at my desk.
First, I try my best not to shake hands. As soon as we are done, I am thanking you for your business while ushering you towards the door. I am carrying your paperwork and as much s%$# as I can so you don’t reach for my hand. Especially if you just coughed up half your lung in your hand for the last 10 minutes. Seriously there are some times I have actually had to say to the customer that I wouldn’t shake their hand:
1. Guy in my office, coughing in his hand and has a hanky to wipe his nose. We get done and he reached out. I say, sir you appear to be sick and I see a lot of people every day. I don’t think that would be wise. He was upset. I didn’t give a damn.
2. Woman I helped said she didn’t want to stay long, she thinks she has pink eye and is headed to the doctor. After we are done, she reaches. I laughed. Don’t think so. Pink eye?
3. A woman’s kid is sick. You can see the red cheeks, he is hacking up and his nose is running like a faucet. She is wiping his nose with her hand. All over the chair, my desk. Just nasty. Then reaches out to shake. I told her “I think he is sick and, well, your hand … ” She understood but said, “You must not be a father, yet.” Me: Yes, I have two kids. I neglected to say, “I have kids, but that doesn’t make us animals.” Nasty.
4. A guy can barely talk and has a hanky in his hand. I am helping him in our lobby with a bunch of people around. His girlfriend finally says, “Do we have to wait long? He has strep throat.” Whoa. I back up. She is surprised? He actually reaches out. I said, “That is very contagious, sir. I don’t think that would be prudent.”
His girl writes a nasty feedback card because we “made him wait like the rest of the customers” and “acted like he was a leper.” I laughed my ass off when I threw that card away. Keep his sick ass home.